You know what you shouldn't do when your department head gives me a potted plant, complete with a beautiful ceramic base? You shouldn't kill it.
I killed it.
Poor thing looks like I transplanted it from Mount Sinai (you know, that mountain where the G-O-D gave the 10 commandments to an adorably sexy Charlton Heston and then he came down and was pissed at those whores, anyways). It's dead. Perhaps, I over-watered it? I mean, I tried to water that damn thing at least twice a week and maybe more. In my defense, my mother never grew plants or crap like that. She would get petunias in the little black plastic boxes. That was the extent, for the most part, of her green thumb. She had too much going on with raising us girls, helping Daddy on the farm, being a gopher for all the farm errands, etc. I was never taught "This is how you take care of plants, etc".
So far the past several months, it's been sitting on the floor of my office, which is beautiful. My office is beautiful and huge and it stuck out like a sore thumb. I tried, I really did try. But since the damn thing doesn't tell me specifically what it needed, I just gave up from trying.
Relationships are the same way.
Even though when we start out we have the honest best intentions. You know when you pick up the plants from Home Depot or wherever they sell plants, they're beautiful. They're green and the flowers are gorgeous. I mean, I'd never buy a flowering plant that DIDN'T have flowers on it. Because that indicates to me a LOT of work. And patience until they ARE pretty. And the people who buy basic green plants? I never understood that. Why?! Don't you want the flashy pretty colored plants with flowers? And you just gave to plop it in the ground and soak up all the compliments on your pretty flowers?!
The exact same way that plants take patience, time, and trial and error, so do relationships. This weekend, ajl and I experienced a miscommunication of sorts. I thought one thing and he thought another. I was all sorts of steamed and pissed and hurt on Sunday. I was confused and disappointed with him, all the long he was the SAME with me. He was steamed and pissed and hurt at me. I was trying the silent treatment to him, but much like my almost-dead plant, it did not make the situation any better. It made it worse. When we take care of plants, they don't specifically tell us "Hey lazy girl on facebook, I am kinda parched here sitting in your window all fn day. Some water would be divine!"
Much like relationships, unless we vocalize what is going on, someone is in the dark. I can't hear my plants "head" rattle and ajl can't hear my head rattle. I had no intentions of killing this plant and fortunately, Kim (our fabulous facilities guru) is going to nurse her back to health. Kim's assistance and knowledge in this situation, is similar to a conversation with your significant other. I can't say that I'll never again give ajl the silent treatment when I'm upset with him, but I will keep in mind that, much like my nearly dead plant, he can't hear my head rattle unless I communicate with him.
And maybe I'll stick with plastic flowers from now on or ajl and I should get a plant to see if we can keep that alive.