Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Dedicated to my sister number 3

For those that don't know me well enough to comment on my hair type, allow me to divulge. I have a thick head of gorgeous dark brown hair, that's wavy/curly when allowed to be au naturale. My bangs are being grown out now, because having them in the heat of summer was/is a bad poofy decision. I recently had Erin put a darker shade of brown (2.5) on my hair, to have it match my eyebrows perfectly and love it. Gone are the days when I tried to lighten my hair. Oh dear god, when I was a freshman in college and a self proclaimed "jersey chaser" (those experience are a whole new different blog for another day..), I had long hair with blond highlights (one of my precious cousins called it "zebra stripes" at a fellow cousins wedding.. Yeah, I was cool). For some reason, I thought having blond in my hair was cool (?) Never again. I'll never put caramel or red highlights in my hair. Ever. Again. The only thing I'm doing is going darker. Sexy darker. Mysterious darker. God, I love how I go off topic all the time.

When I'm in the shower, I always pull out handfuls of hair. As in enough hair to produce a wig for a cancer patient. And I can say that, because my mother has breast cancer and attempted to wear a wig, which she never really wore (again, a whole new blog on that topic at some point will need to be given out). It's really sickening the hair I produce, that I put on the wall of the shower I am currently enjoying. After shampooing, I can pull out several handfuls of hair. Then, with conditioner: more hair. This loss of hair, should be painful physically right? I mean for the average guy, if you were to take away that much hair, they'd be looking like... well, a bald headed handsome man (cue: my handsome radio nerd). I am sure when I first noticed that I was losing pounds of hair, it scared me. But, with time passing, it become no big deal. A part of my shower routine, along with shaving my legs daily (damn hair grows like a weed).

Sister Number Three heads off to Hays, Kansas tomorrow morning to start her freshman year of college. Her I remember that Christmas eve morning that girl was born. Now, she's starting a whole new chapter of her life. Essentially, her life is starting tomorrow. Who she was until this point, will be a past chapter this time next year. The bullshit of high school will be a forgotten memory in a year book that she'll never look at again. The cool kids of high school, will still be living at home with their parents and hanging out with the same kids from high school. That is all cool, for some.

But not for Alayna Bergkamp.

She has dreams meant to accomplish outside of Harvey County, but she'll always have a bit of us in her heart. Nerves and anxious feelings will disappear as the hourglass is moved upside down and she grows into the mold she already has. She'll fail. Hell, she may even bite it on college dorm steps in front of "everyone" (and seeing that it IS Fort Hays, tha'd be.... 5 students) and won't want to leave her dorm room. That big exam she studied for "weeks" for (ha), she'll fail and call home crying to Mom. Her first love may break her heart (and re-break) in a way that only the first love truly can (and get way with it) and she'll call her sisters to bitch and say she'll never get over him.

She will.

She'll find her oldest sister's tough love to be annoying and she'll think she "doesn't get it. She never had this happen to her." Oh, but I have.

But what she'll never second guess is that I will get on I-70 so fast, that it'll make heads turn the second she needs me. I won't think twice. I won't care (but I will charge her for gas). Whether it is 2 am or 4 pm. She has family. She has sisters (and dedicated soon-to-be brother in laws).

She has a life. And she's going to get busy living it.